Surfer Girl

Didn't I just finish talking about what a walking LA cliche I am? Well, now we've upped the ante.

Having been raised on the ski slopes as a small child and spending the rest of my youth on the back of a horse, I feel confident in saying that I like extreme-type sports. And having grown up in the family pool and snorkeling in the Caribbean since I was six, I also feel confident in claiming myself as a competent swimmer.

But the number of times I have sunk my delicate Swiss feet into the gaping maw of the Pacific? Once before yesterday. So it's safe to say that I was grossly underestimating what awaited me. But when my friend Phil called me up to say he and his roommate Dan were surfing and they'd have a board for me at Venice, I thought, "Hey, why not?"And off I went on my jaunty little way.

So when I got there, we started off without the boards, just getting a little wet, swimming around, etc. Except the waves were so fierce, each minute in the water felt less like an afternoon splash and more like an animal instinct to survive. Let me be clear; I understand how waves work. I understand that as it churns over your head there's another part that sucks you back under. This motion is in itself terrifying to think about, like the ocean's natural defense against soft flabby little humans.
What's even more difficult for me to grasp is the natural rhythm in which these waves move. Every time a wave would break directly onto my head and the boys would yell out for me to duck under, I got too scared to let myself be sucked under the ocean and decided I would rather the wave knock me on my pristine, land-lubbing ass. They got a kick out of it but I would not go out farther than waist level and stood there, letting wave after wave slam against me. I thought to myself, This is not fun.

So after what seemed like eternity we came back to our towels and they grabbed their boards. I said, "I'm gonna take a break and watch you guys for a little bit." They walked off, shaking their heads at my cowardice, and I watched them vault themselves into the great abyss where their boards could crack open their skulls, where sharks lurked, where any number of things in the great big sea were lying in wait to murder them. No thanks.

But... you give me enough time to mull it over, and I generally work myself up to something. If I get it in my head that I'm going to do it, I'll do it. I mean, I live in LA. For a person to not have at least tried surfing once is just...well, it's sad. I figured if I tried it and hated it, I would never have to do it again, but I would also never forgive myself for letting fear keep me in my comfort zone. Ever since I've been out here I've done nothing but go out of my comfort zone, and it has worked out amazingly every single time.

So I screwed up my courage and picked up the last board. The guys noticed me coming out and came onshore to help get me started. I strapped on my leash and started walking into the water, which I believe I referred to at the time as "Motherf@!*ing cold!" Later Phil and Dan would say I turned purple in the water, but I really didn't notice anything until my toes went numb.

So I hopped on the board and found my balance, and instantly everything was better. I was no longer getting slammed by waves but riding them into the air, paddling with my arms on every downstroke. They turned me around a few times and tried to launch me off a wave, wherein I would get slammed by the force behind me, slip from my board, and be thrust into a swirling vortex that would momentarily suck me under. But I would come up for air smiling each time. What can I say? Every time you go out of your comfort zone, it just gets that much wider.

I did not make it to standing that day, try though I might. But I see it as a major first step in conquering the ocean-- or at least, my fear of it. The times where I was able to ride the waves was such a complete rush- I totally get now how surfers are addicted to their sport. And I want to be one of them. In due time, with a few lessons, and maybe one of those anti-shark electronic bracelets, I think surfing will be an excellent replacement for the slopes and the hooves. Plus, I'ma look so damn cool.